Day … Whatever
Okay, I wandered away from the blog for a few days. Maybe I was subconsciously avoiding the topic of depression, but I don’t think so. Just had a lot of deadlines to meet.
Anyway, I’m back and excited to share that the last couple of weeks have been amazing in my journey to understand the dark days that settle over me without appointment and stay way past their welcome.
The first thing the Lord showed me was that I needed to have music playing as often as possible. A wise friend of mine once said, “Too much time alone in one’s own head can be dangerous.”
Ya think? But that’s where I was. So I turned on the music and found myself immediately soothed and relaxed. And I really don’t believe that only Christian music can be uplifting. The “oldies” do wonders for me when I’m cleaning or sweating through some other wearisome task. Classical piano music keeps me focused and alert when I’m writing. But there is definitely something healing in praise music that draws us into the presence of God.
The Bible says God inhabits our praises. Think about what that actually means. When we lift our eyes, our voices, and our thoughts to Him, God saturates us with His presence. His love. His comfort. His wisdom. His joy.
We don’t look to God to provide what we need in the dark times. We look to God because He is what we need. His very presence in our hearts and lives.
In the last two weeks, I think music has helped tremendously in keeping the dark times at bay. But that said, I’ve still had a few days when everything seemed to be going well and all of a sudden I felt drained and overwhelmingly sad. When I couldn’t put into words what was happening to me. I just knew I wanted to go to bed and sleep. To stop thinking. To escape.
These are tough times. But God has shown me something fresh and powerful during these last few episodes, and I’ll share that with you in my next blog. Baby steps in my journey, maybe. But huge in refilling my hope in the Lord. For He is my light in the dark. My song in the night. And my breath of peace and joy in the morning.
God loves me. And He loves you! More than any of us could ever imagine!
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